How to Make Friends and Influence Enemies

A simple guide that will make your life a billion times better. Or at least make you laugh. Or make you glad you aren't me. Or make you wish you were me. At any rate, it may or may not change your life/interest you/make you smile/make you cry/do something.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Lesson Number Twenty-Two

The matters of the teenage heart are soon forgotten.

Lesson Number Twenty-One

Busy can be fun, but it's also stressful.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Lesson Number Twenty

Getting up in the morning is pretty bad, but a heck of a lot better than the alternative. (Actually, I don't mean dying, although that's what it looks like. Because I guess being dead would be better. I mean if you don't get up and your mom yells at you.)

Lesson Number Nineteen

Sometimes you need to let people think they've won, when they actually haven't.

Lesson Number Eighteen

It is no shame to be poor, but it is no great honor, either.

Lesson Number Seventeen

If you insist repeatedly that something will be fun that usually makes the thing in question appear repulsive, and will become no fun.

Lesson Number Sixteen

If you put your whole self into something and show that you're really trying, you don't need to worry about people laughing at you, because you've already shown that you're above that. So they probably won't laugh.

Lesson Number Fifteen

Beer is bad.

Lesson Number Fourteen

Be more prepared than you think you need to be.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Lesson Number Thirteen

It never fails. Right when you really want to talk to a certain person, that person is nowhere to be found.

Lesson Number Twelve

Don't get mad. Don't get even. Don't listen to your iPod so loudly that you don't hear people knock on your door.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Lesson Number Eleven

Sometimes things just don't make sense until you get help. Sometimes you need to work things out on your own.

Lesson Number Ten

Spending time with your family is valuable. Don't give it up.

Lesson Number Nine

Sometimes you lose track of old friends. This can be very sad, but it can also make you happy when you see them.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Lesson Number Eight

Talking will not kill you. It may cause extreme embarrassment, though.

Lesson Number Seven

Ideas have consequences.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Lesson Number Six

Everyone is just as important as everyone else.

Lesson Number Five

To be early is to be on time, to be on time is to be late, to be late is to cheat yourself and others of the main goal.
-Mrs J.

Lesson Number Four

Don't dance two dances in a row with a guy at a square dance if you don't want someone to think you like the guy in question.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Lesson Number Three

You can find happiness anywhere if you look for it. Look for it.

Friday, September 08, 2006

Lesson Number Two

If you are a friend to someone, they will be a friend to you. Don't be shy. If you act like yourself, people will like you. Unless yourself is like, Orlando Bloom or some other annoying person. Just kidding.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Lesson Number One

Start learning things as soon as possible, even if you don't have to/will have the chance to learn them later/they are hard. It may make you look smarter than you actually are.